I Always Come Home From New York Feeling Full.

There’s a rumble in my belly.

The kind of rumble you only get when you’re hungry.

I’ve been hungry for a long time.

There’s a burning sensation inside of me lusting after the concrete jungle that is infamous for turning dreams into reality.

Of course no place is perfect, but that’s okay, because I want it for better or worse.

This past weekend I went back to New York. Like every other time I’ve been to the city, I returned feeling an immense amount of inspiration to get up off my ass and do something with myself. From the fast-paced walk of pedestrians to the impatient beeps of car horns, it’s hard to move slowly.

I like to think the accessibility of the city plays a major role in my spike in motivation. Most things are only a train ride away. One moment I can be in a Brooklyn Airbnb writing out every project that I want to accomplish. A few hours later I can be partying with my childhood idols on a Manhattan rooftop receiving their praise for those same projects.

The simple fact that a world that has always felt like nothing more than a production on a screen, is real, and happening around me, drives me to pour myself into my passions and be the best that I can be.

I’ve been to two New York Fashion Weeks, but neither come close to the experience I imagine I will have one day. I see myself attending high-end runway shows because designers will want to share their art with me as I share mine with them. I see myself hosting exclusive brand parties, producing my own activations, and most importantly telling impactful stories around product.

The beauty of New York is that everyone wants to be someone. Everyone wants to create something that will withstand the test of time and blossom into a moment that shifted culture. Some will go to astronomical heights even if that means sacrificing creative integrity for a smidge of clout. While others are more willing to lean into their community in search of an authentic story to build something from scratch. This means it may take longer to achieve the desired results. The similarity between both of these kinds of people is that they know what they want & they are willing to put themselves out there to make it happen.

Something about motion is so appealing to me. Making those necessary steps to move forward and up. New York is always moving & I love that.

Whether it’s a construction worker up bright and early for work to build another skyscraper or a vendor up way too late trying to sell you some jewelry in the train station. You can guarantee that they are making those strides in hopes of achieving freedom from survival and finally have the opportunity to live.

In the south if I decide at 2 am that I need to run to a corner store for a pick-me-up energy drink and snack so that I can spend the late hours buried in my laptop creating mood boards, I feel as though I have to tiptoe. Tiptoe around the silent sleeping bodies who may not always understand that practicality isn’t the only reason for doing.

I want to be important. I think I’m important now, but I need the people who I admire and sign checks to share that same sentiment. I want my ideas to mean something.

Being in New York reminds me that the figures that I glamorize through the microscope of social media back at home, are just as real as me. They breathe the same air as me, and once had that same longing to be valued. Not only as an image to sell to consumers but as a person with real feelings and ideas.

There is always going to be a need for a black voice. In marketing, music, fashion, media, etc. A voice that reminds the world that we too are imaginative. That our joy is more than just a ploy to push a political or capitalistic scheme. It’s something that exists all on its own and is essential to a community that has been subjected to far too much pain.

There will always be a need for a woman's voice. To recognize the strength of the past and the beauty of the future. To showcase the diversity in femininity and encourage all people to embrace it. A voice that is complex and provokes the world to show compassion while providing necessary criticism to push forward.

I aspire to translate my adventures of the south into exhibitions for the north & eventually expand globally. I’ve never felt more at home away from home than when I’m in New York. I hope that the city can serve as a launching point for me to harvest a community of new generation thinkers equally as hungry as me to curate new recipes of success.

In New York, the sound of the sloshing water of the Hudson River reminds me that under the metal, concrete, and hustle, there is still earth that exists. It’s extremely grounding to sit out on the grass at the piers and admire the skyline. It can be hard not to get caught up in the chase when you are constantly running towards something.

My admiration is deeper than the physical structures of the urban jungle. My brain wonders what is happening behind the many windows of the buildings. Whether or not the people in those tightly packed rooms are as hungry as me to conquer the city or if they simply want to escape their entrapment. Either way, I hope they still believe the magic the city encompasses despite its many harsh realities.

One day I know that I will return to New York to stay. I know that the temporary fullness of a weekend trip will fade because I will no longer be riding on fleeting inspiration, but become the epitome of it. Creating and redistributing it to other black girls who need to see that they too can come from humble beginnings and eat. Because there is a table that was built for us. And with every generation, it’s our job to upkeep it. There is a plate full of opportunity just waiting to be devoured.

Not just in New York, but everywhere.